Orc Massage Guide Fixed | 2027 |

Before you begin, make sure you're in a comfortable and quiet environment. Dim the lights, light some candles, and put on some soothing music. You'll also need:

This guide is a work of fantasy lore and creative exploration for tabletop RPGs, fiction writing, and LARPing. No Orcs were harmed (or soothed) in the making of this article.

So remove your shirt, bite down on the leather strap, and roar.

For the glutes and lumbar region, your hands are too small. orc massage guide

The Goblin Manicure Guide (It involves dental tools and caution).

Increases the rate at which customer satisfaction grows per second.

Do not start with prodding. Start with movement. Before you begin, make sure you're in a

“Pain is just tension leaving the body. Do not scream, it startles the Orc.”

Grants a passive bonus to the flat gold payout at the end of a session.

Orc massage: “GRUNT.”

Not all Orc massages are the same. Depending on which clan the healer hails from, the style changes.

Spend your gold in the shop to buy better lotions, oils, and room decor.